Musings of a young mother...

Sorry, another woe is me post

2011-12-22T13:28:00.000-08:00

Sorry this has become my forum for complaining and venting... I am just so stressed out right now that I need some place to get everything down.

I want everyone to have a good Christmas. Every year we go out of our way to do things for other people to make their Christmas better even though we don't really have the money because I don't want anyone to be dissapointed or left out. This always means pushing our budget to the very ends of it's limits to make things better for other people. Two years ago it was stuffing four stockings for people who would have otherwise gone without a stocking. Last year it was stuffing a stocking for someone who would have gone without, plus having an extra gift for them so they would have something to open Christmas morning. This year it is stuffing three extra stockings, plus making a special traditional breakfast for everyone, opening our home to extra people most every night until the end of the year, and cooking for twice as many people most nights....

This has gotten out of control. Our budget can't take it. We are hard pressed as it is, and to have 1-5 more mouths to feed every night for weeks is killing our budget. As it is I am not sure we are going to be able to feed ourselves the last week of the year. I am trying to be hospitable and kind and make everyone have a nice Christmas, but it seems like they are all coming, expecting to be fed, so they can save money, which makes it so we are the ones spending the money instead.

I think what pushed me over the edge was last night. Yesterday I was very busy, ran all over the place, was super tired, and then at 4:30 ish I got a call asking what was for Dinner. I had not planned on feeding extra people that night, so I had to change plans last minute. I ran home, ignored my in-laws who were at my home (which I didn't really want to do, but had no choice) while I started throwing together the only meal I had in the house that would feed enough people. I spent four hours baking bread bowls and making soup from scratch. On my feet the whole time. Our dinner guests showed up, ate, one of them complained about the food being "Too Hot", and the proceeded to sprawl across my couch and turn on my television while I cleaned up from the meal. They did not thank me, they did not offer to help with the dishes or cleaning, they complained about my children walking in front of the television, informed me that one of them would be staying the night, and then practically demanded I go find her pajamas so she would be comfortable.

I don't mind having guests, but I would actually like my efforts to be acknowledged and appreciated. After spending 4 hours making a meal I was not planning on it would be nice to be able to sit on my own couch, or have somebody else do the dishes, or at least hear a "THANK YOU"!

Right now I am their Santa Claus who is filling their stockings and creating their nice Christmas... and they are on my naughty list.

Just feel like I am going above and beyond and no one is thinking about how they could make my Christmas better. Feeding all these extra people has pushed my budget to the point that without a Christmas miracle we are not going to be able to eat the first week of January. I've cooked them many meals, but when was the last time any of them cooked for me, or even offered to help? I've done 12 loads of dishes since Saturday! I normally would have done about 7! I have been so busy cooking and cleaning and making them comfortable that I haven't had time to do my own laundry and had to wear dirty underclothing yesterday. I feel like because they are off of school, or out of work, or taking leave from Basic training they are taking a holiday, and because I don't have any of those things to "Take a break" from I am expected to do twice as much work.

Okay. I will stop ranting. I just needed to let it out.

I love all of them, I just want them to acknowledge that I am working my butt off and maybe offer a little help. After all, it's Christmas, and I shouldn't be the only one not enjoying it.

How much more can I take?

2011-12-05T14:26:00.000-08:00

This year has been so long and horrible. I am so done with 2011. I am done with scrimping and saving ans trying so hard to make what we have work, only to find that my best efforts are not enough. I'm tired of feeling like the slightest indulgence or want is horrible. Tired of second guessing every penny that is not spent on food and crying when there is not enough money to go around. Tired of one little thing ruining our budget because it is so tight that $2 can make or break it.

We had to make the decision with our last paycheck wether to have power or food for this week. We didn't have enough money to pay for both once rent money was taken out. We decided that without power food would be irrelevant, as we would not be able to power our stove or keep our refridgerator running without power, and the weather would make it unbearably cold. We paid our power bill and hoped we would be able to figure something out before we ran out of food.

Well, that day came today. We had thought Dominic would be able to sell back his books today and get enough money for us to make it through to Friday when our paycheck came in. Turns out book buy back doesn't start until friday.

I called the bishop to see if we could get a food order, but he can't meet with us until next week.

We applied for food stamps, but they denied us.

We've already been to the food bank, we received a box of scalloped potatoes, a few cans of food, some moldy bread, and 4 steaks. Being that we are vegetarian, and I don't want to die from eating mold spores this isn't nearly enough to keep us going until friday. We traded the steak with a friend for some mushrooms, milk, a bit of cheese, and some tortillas, but the food is gone already after just two days.

I can't even make bread because I don't have sugar for the yeast to eat.

I am at my ropes end. I am in tears trying to figure out how to make what little food we have into meals for the next four days. And it's not like we spent our money haphazardly and that's why we are in this situation. This past month only $15 was spent on non-essentials, and that was for netflix so we would have something to entertain us all through the month. Every penny more has gone to food, utilities, and rent. I have $30 in amazon credit, but that can't buy my children food.

I am trying my hardest, but there is just never enough. I can't get a job because I would have to make $14 an hour just to afford the childcare costs. I can't stretch my money any further than i already am. I have tried everything I can think of and it is just not enough.

What do you do when you have tried your hardest and pushed yourself to the very limit and it is still not enough? I can't just give up, but I can't go a single step forward anymore without breaking down into tears and crying knowing that my kids just don't understand why we don't have food.

In ten days it's my birthday, and all I really want for my birthday is to have food in my fridge and my bills paid, but I doubt I will even get that. It will be just another day of scrimping and stretching, and praying that we will make it to the next paycheck. I doubt I will get a single phone call or visit from a friend, let alone gifts. It will just be another lonely, horrible day of worrying.

Holidays

2011-11-29T10:42:00.000-08:00

Feeling a little overwhelmed at the thought that December starts in just two days! We have family coming from out of state to be here for the holidays, and are housing at least one person for a weekend, as well as mostly serving as a home base for holiday gatherings with Dominic's family. My house is messy, my decorations aren't even in our house yet, let alone put up, I'm behind on my album I was putting together, since I ran out of adhesive and don't have any money for more. I just don't know where to start. I want this December to be great and I want my boys to have a lot of fun, but I don't know how I am going to balance getting the house clean, doing fun activities with the boys every day, and trying to raise money for our Christmas fund. I want everything to be great, but it all pretty much falls on my shoulders alone.

I am so not used to this practically being a single parent thing. Dominic used to be around a lot more, and he would help when I was feeling overwhelmed or under the weather. Now he's gone ALL THE TIME, and I have to do everything for myself. It's hard running a household by yourself, especially when small children are involved.

Lately I just feel like I am running on empty, not getting enough time to do the things I would like to do in favor of having to use all my energy trying to catch up. It makes me even less likely to do the things I need to do, as it all is just piling up with no outlet. I can't scrapbook because I have no money for adhesive. I can't go out with friends because I have no money for food or a movie, let alone for a babysitter, since Dom is gone so often.

I don't know how to get out of this funk.

Anyway....

This Holiday season I really want to focus on experiences, doing things together as a family, experiencing local traditions, and enjoying each others company. Dominic may be getting a part-time job for the holidays, but if he doesn't it will be especially important to do things together, as we don't get family time very often anymore. I want my home to be clean and peaceful, so we can welcome guests. I don't want to feel stressed about getting things cleaned, or having time to clean AND do activities. I just want everything to fall into place so that we can enjoy. I want to have time to laugh and reflect and enjoy instead of being the one who has to make everything work out. I want a break! That's really what I want, a month where I am not loaded with responsibilities so that I can enjoy my little boys.

I think to accomplish this we need to spend more time in the mornings cleaning up, so the rest of the day can be spent enjoying the season and shuttling about and then we can come home to a nice clean apartment and not feel stressed the second we come home. The fact that we are planning on spending a lot of time out and doing things will make keeping the house clean easier if we can manage to get it clean in the first place.

Been a While

2011-08-09T15:48:00.000-07:00

I haven't blogged on here in months! Life has been so hectic with school, moving, little boys running around, etc. I'd like to say I will start posting more, but I doubt it will happen!

Anyway, I am trying to come up with some ideas for my kitchen/dining room because it is just too blank (as are many of the rooms in our house) and I want it to be a more inviting place. Been racking my brain all day trying to come up with something and stumbled upon this idea where they hung a ton of different "N's" on the wall. Different fonts, colors, and sizes, but all N's. I thought the idea was interesting and started thinking of doing an "F" wall for our last name. As I was thinking about it I thought what if instead of just the letter F I did a collage of words that started with F that had to do with family and food. I'm thinking a sort of gallery wall look. This is still just in the beginning stages in my mind. I'm starting to compile a list of F words to use. Here's what I've got so far:
Family
Forever
Flavor
Food
Ford
Faith
Feast
Fresh
Favorite
Festive
Friends
Flames
Fork
Fever
Flour
Fruit
Anyone else have some ideas? I'm kind of excited to start gathering things for this project. If anyone sees an F that is at least 3 inches high let me know! I'm going to need them!

I Needed that

2010-09-20T08:48:00.000-07:00

This weekend Dom took the boys camping with my dad and the scouts. This left me at home all weekend alone. Unable to find friends to hang out with I decided I would go out and do something for myself. I got my hair dyed and cut, and my eye brows waxed. It made me feel so much better about myself to do something for me! Right now life is crazy and I am always doing homework or cleaning, or something. This was the first time I got to go out by myself and do something that didn't benefit anyone but me. I feel fabulous and renewed!

The Vegetarian Mom updated

2010-09-10T11:00:00.000-07:00

This semester I am taking a website design class. As part of the class we are developing a website of our choosing, buying a domain name, and publishing our site on the web. I had been thinking about what I would do for this when it suddenly came to me: Vegetarian meals.
In a post some time ago I lamented the fact that there is not a great resource for the busy vegetarian who would like to do once a month cooking (freezer meals) and mused about writing a cookbook on just that topic. I got quite a few responses to it from strangers around the web looking for the same things. I put it off in my mind as a "maybe later".
Well "maybe later" is here, but in a slightly different medium! I have decided to develop a website on this! I am going to be testing vegetarian variants of freezer meals I can find, as well as crockpot meals, and quick meals, and compiling them into a website that is just what I have been looking for this whole time!
If you have come upon this post looking for just these things be looking for posts on my progress on this website! And please post your encouragement and suggestions for me so I can make this a website that will work for others like me!

You can now find my blog for this at www.thevegetarianmom.blogspot.com
If you like what you see go over to facebook and "like" the vegetarian mom here.

Maybe I should..

2010-09-03T08:41:00.000-07:00

On monday I was stumbling (try stumble upon! It's amazing) and founda tutorial on how to make a fabric flower. It looked easy enough, and I had all the materials at hand, so I made one. It turned out great! I got lots of compliments on it, and after they found out I made it myself, several people encouraged me to start an etsy shop and start selling them.
Considering how fast, easy, and inexpensive it was to make I am seriously considering it.
The biggest thing in my way is confidence. I don't fell like I can do it. I feel like I will fail. I am afraid to try. I have a bunch of ideas and inspiration, and I think it would be really fun, but I am not sure I could actually sell them. Where do I start? How much inventory do I need? What can I do to set my product apart from all the others? What would my line be called? Should I market to little babies, women, teens, a little of all of them?
I don't know, all of it just overwhelms me!
I think today I am going to go out and buy myself some fabric to make a dress, so while I'm out I am going to price out lining fabric and see what sorts of stuff I can find on the clearance rack and start making a few more... We'll see where it goes.

Sometimes I hate people...

2010-08-27T09:17:00.000-07:00

I have been seriously struggling lately with feelings of deprivation and putting my wants and needs last. With money tight the last month or so I have put off pretty much everything that I wanted, and even most things that I needed in order to get by and take care of my family. I didn't eat practically all of finals week because I knew the money needed to be spent elsewhere. I have gone without for my family, and now that there is some money that I can actually do something with I am being chastised for wanting to spend some money on myself.
Is life really worth it if you have to deprive yourself of everything? Am I really selfish for wanting to go out and get a haircut? Or maybe some pants since I'm about to wear a whole in the bottom of the only pair of jeans that fit? Is it wrong of me to want to buy some thread so that I can alter a dress I bought forever ago into a modest shirt? Is it really wrong of me to want to do something for myself instead of doing everything for everyone else?
I spent all summer going to school so that my family will be better off some day. I hated it, I struggled. I did it for them, not for me. I sacrificed going to girl's nights with my friends so my family could eat longer. I sacrificed doing my hobbies so Dom could have time to do his.
Everyone one keeps telling me that motherhood is about sacrifice, but at what point do you put your foot down and say, "What about me?". Am I really going to be a better mother if I deprive myself of everything?
I guess I am just a selfish horrible person. Thanks people for making me feel guilty for wanting to take care of myself. You suck.

Starting School

2010-04-10T10:22:00.000-07:00

Next week marks the begining of a new adventure for Ryan and I: School.
Ryan has gotten to be quite the handful of energy, and in an attempt to harness that energy we are going to start having some more formal education. This week I put up a little area for what we are going to learn, designed some flash cards, got some art supplies, and went to the library for some books. Monday we start learning! What are we learning about? Cows. That's right, Cows.

Holiday Values

2009-11-21T07:53:00.000-08:00

With my Holidays in Hand class I was asked to write about what I want for our Christmas together as a family. What sort of goals I have, what things I would like to do, what feelings I would like our family to feel, etc. So here I go.

I would like to feel peace and happiness, instead of stress. I want it to be about spending time with my family, doing things together, having fun, learning, etc. I want the house to be filled with laughter and love. I want to make it a memorable Christmas for Ryan, because this will be his most interesting Christmas so far. I want Ryan to feel wonder and awe. I want to teach him more about the meaning of Christmas, about giving, about the most important things in life.

I'm sure I will think of more as the days go on, but that is the basics.

Holidays in Hand + December Daily

2009-11-20T21:41:00.000-08:00

My December Daily album is going well. I've got pages through the 22nd, only a few more to go! It's turning out really nice so far. A few pages I'm not too thrilled about, but I still have time to change them!
Anyway, that leads me to my next thing. I'm taking a class from a lady named Jessica Sprauge called Holidays in Hand. Basically it's a class to help me journal about this Christmas, and those in the past. It is the perfect compliment to my December Daily album! I started late, due to not getting on the internet for a few days, but I am excited to get started today.

2009-10-28T17:02:00.000-07:00

I started on my December Daily Album! I have all my papers cut, my page protectors organized, and a few pages actually done! They are done in different size protectors, so the sizes are different, and it makes a really cool effect when it's all together! Here they are:

So, what do you think? I'd love some input!

December Daily

2009-10-28T10:20:00.001-07:00

I am the queen of unfinished projects.

But I really want to try this again!

I am getting a jump start this morning, but I think what I really need is to have someone to do it with me. Does anyone want to get together and play? Making albums is so much fun, but it's better when you have someone else there! I really want to get this done this year and document our Christmas season. I've been trying to "create" something every day and I think this would be so much fun...
Ask me again in a month if I am still working on this... the answer will probably be no... I have a hard time with this.

2009-10-26T14:39:00.000-07:00

It's been a crazy busy month!
That said, here's a little look at what I've been doing:
The Blog
The Website
The Event

We've been helping my father-in-law get his business up and running, and we've been so busy! It's going pretty well, and I really hope all our effort pays off! We had a portrait party this last weekend, and though the turnout wasn't as good as we expected we had lots of fun! Dad got the cutest picture of jackson. you should go to the Blog and vot for your favorite of the canidates from Saturday! Vote Here!

Happiness

2009-10-05T07:09:00.000-07:00

Last sunday in church we had a lesson on a talk by Elder Uchtdorf from the 2008 General Relief Society Meeting. It made an impression on me and I would like to share it here.

Happiness, Your Heritage

President Dieter F. Uchtdorf
Second Counselor in the First Presidency

Our birthright—and the purpose of our great voyage on this earth—is to seek and experience eternal happiness.

My dear sisters, I am grateful for this, my first opportunity to speak to the women of the Church gathered together in all parts of the world. We are especially honored today with the presence of President Monson and President Eyring. The choir has touched our hearts. We have been inspired by the messages of Sister Thompson, Sister Allred, and Sister Beck.

Since learning that I would be with you today, I have thought about the many women who have shaped my life: my wonderful wife, Harriet; my mother; my mother-in-law; my sister; my daughter; my daughter-in-law; and many friends. All my life I have been surrounded by women who inspired, taught, and encouraged me. I am who I am today in large part because of these singular women. Each time I meet with the sisters of the Church, I sense that I am in the midst of similar remarkable souls. I am grateful to be here, grateful for your talents, compassion, and service. Most of all, I am grateful for who you are: treasured daughters of our Heavenly Father with infinite worth.

I’m sure it comes as no surprise, but the differences between men and women can often be quite striking—physically and mentally, as well as emotionally. One of the best ways I can think of to illustrate this is in the way my wife and I cook a meal.

When Harriet prepares a meal, it’s a masterpiece. Her cuisine is as wide-ranging as the world, and she frequently prepares dishes from countries we have visited. The presentation of the food is awe inspiring. In fact, it often looks so beautiful that it seems a crime to eat it. It’s as much a feast for the eyes as it is for the sense of taste.

But sure enough, no matter how perfect everything is, looks, and tastes, Harriet will apologize for something she thinks is imperfect. “I’m afraid I used a touch too much ginger,” she will say, or, “Next time, I think it would be better if I used a little more curry and one additional bay leaf.”

Let me contrast that with the way I cook. For the purpose of this talk, I asked Harriet to tell me what I cook best.

Her answer: fried eggs.

Sunny-side up.

But that isn’t all. I have a specialty dish called Knusperchen. The name may sound like a delicacy you might find at an exclusive restaurant. Let me share with you how to make it. You cut French bread into small slices and toast them twice.

That is the recipe!

So, between fried eggs, even when they are greasy, and Knusperchen, even when they are burned, when I cook, I feel pretty heroic.

Perhaps this contrast between my wife and me is a slight exaggeration, but it illustrates something that may extend beyond preparing meals.

To me it appears that our splendid sisters sometimes undervalue their abilities—they focus on what is lacking or imperfect rather than what has been accomplished and who they really are.

Perhaps you recognize this trait in someone you know really well.

The good news is that this also points to an admirable quality: the innate desire to please the Lord to the best of your ability. Unfortunately, it can also lead to frustration, exhaustion, and unhappiness.

To All Who Are Weary

Today I would like to speak to those who have ever felt inadequate, discouraged, or weary—in short, I would like to speak to all of us.

I also pray that the Holy Ghost will amplify my words and bestow upon them additional meaning, insight, and inspiration.

We know that sometimes it can be difficult to keep our heads above water. In fact, in our world of change, challenges, and checklists, sometimes it can seem nearly impossible to avoid feeling overwhelmed by emotions of suffering and sorrow.

I am not suggesting that we can simply flip a switch and stop the negative feelings that distress us. This isn’t a pep talk or an attempt to encourage those sinking in quicksand to imagine instead they are relaxing on a beach. I recognize that in all of our lives there are real concerns. I know there are hearts here today that harbor deep sorrows. Others wrestle with fears that trouble the soul. For some, loneliness is their secret trial.

These things are not insignificant.

However, I would like to speak about two principles that may help you find a path to peace, hope, and joy—even during times of trial and distress. I want to speak about God’s happiness and how each one of us can taste of it in spite of the burdens that beset us.

God’s Happiness

Let me first pose a question: What do you suppose is the greatest kind of happiness possible? For me, the answer to this question is, God’s happiness.

This leads to another question: What is our Heavenly Father’s happiness?

This may be impossible to answer because His ways are not our ways. “For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are [God’s] ways higher than [our] ways, and [His] thoughts [higher] than [our] thoughts.”¹

Though we cannot understand “the meaning of all things,” we do “know that [God] loveth his children”² because He has said, “Behold, this is my work and my glory—to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man.”³

Heavenly Father is able to accomplish these two great goals—the immortality and eternal life of man—because He is a God of creation and compassion. Creating and being compassionate are two objectives that contribute to our Heavenly Father’s perfect happiness. Creating and being compassionate are two activities that we as His spirit children can and should emulate.

The Work of Creation

The desire to create is one of the deepest yearnings of the human soul. No matter our talents, education, backgrounds, or abilities, we each have an inherent wish to create something that did not exist before.

Everyone can create. You don’t need money, position, or influence in order to create something of substance or beauty.

Creation brings deep satisfaction and fulfillment. We develop ourselves and others when we take unorganized matter into our hands and mold it into something of beauty—and I am not talking about the process of cleaning the rooms of your teenage children.

You might say, “I’m not the creative type. When I sing, I’m always half a tone above or below the note. I cannot draw a line without a ruler. And the only practical use for my homemade bread is as a paperweight or as a doorstop.”

If that is how you feel, think again, and remember that you are spirit daughters of the most creative Being in the universe. Isn’t it remarkable to think that your very spirits are fashioned by an endlessly creative and eternally compassionate God? Think about it—your spirit body is a masterpiece, created with a beauty, function, and capacity beyond imagination.

But to what end were we created? We were created with the express purpose and potential of experiencing a fulness of joy.⁴ Our birthright—and the purpose of our great voyage on this earth—is to seek and experience eternal happiness. One of the ways we find this is by creating things.

If you are a mother, you participate with God in His work of creation—not only by providing physical bodies for your children but also by teaching and nurturing them. If you are not a mother now, the creative talents you develop will prepare you for that day, in this life or the next.

You may think you don’t have talents, but that is a false assumption, for we all have talents and gifts, every one of us.⁵ The bounds of creativity extend far beyond the limits of a canvas or a sheet of paper and do not require a brush, a pen, or the keys of a piano. Creation means bringing into existence something that did not exist before—colorful gardens, harmonious homes, family memories, flowing laughter.

What you create doesn’t have to be perfect. So what if the eggs are greasy or the toast is burned? Don’t let fear of failure discourage you. Don’t let the voice of critics paralyze you—whether that voice comes from the outside or the inside.

If you still feel incapable of creating, start small. Try to see how many smiles you can create, write a letter of appreciation, learn a new skill, identify a space and beautify it.

Nearly a century and a half ago, President Brigham Young spoke to the Saints of his day. “There is a great work for the Saints to do,” he said. “Progress, and improve upon and make beautiful everything around you. Cultivate the earth, and cultivate your minds. Build cities, adorn your habitations, make gardens, orchards, and vineyards, and render the earth so pleasant that when you look upon your labors you may do so with pleasure, and that angels may delight to come and visit your beautiful locations. In the mean time continually seek to adorn your minds with all the graces of the Spirit of Christ.”⁶

The more you trust and rely upon the Spirit, the greater your capacity to create. That is your opportunity in this life and your destiny in the life to come. Sisters, trust and rely on the Spirit. As you take the normal opportunities of your daily life and create something of beauty and helpfulness, you improve not only the world around you but also the world within you.

Being Compassionate

Being compassionate is another great work of our Heavenly Father and a fundamental characteristic of who we are as a people. We are commanded to “succor the weak, lift up the hands which hang down, and strengthen the feeble knees.”⁷ Disciples of Christ throughout all ages of the world have been distinguished by their compassion. Those who follow the Savior “mourn with those that mourn . . . and comfort those that stand in need of comfort.”⁸

When we reach out to bless the lives of others, our lives are blessed as well. Service and sacrifice open the windows of heaven, allowing choice blessings to descend upon us. Surely our beloved Heavenly Father smiles upon those who care for the least of His children.

As we lift others, we rise a little higher ourselves. President Spencer W. Kimball taught, “The more we serve our fellowmen in appropriate ways, the more substance there is to our souls.”⁹

President Gordon B. Hinckley believed in the healing power of service. After the death of his wife, he provided a great example to the Church in the way he immersed himself in work and in serving others. It is told that President Hinckley remarked to one woman who had recently lost her husband, “Work will cure your grief. Serve others.”

These are profound words. As we lose ourselves in the service of others, we discover our own lives and our own happiness.

President Lorenzo Snow expressed a similar thought: “When you find yourselves a little gloomy, look around you and find somebody that is in a worse plight than yourself; go to him and find out what the trouble is, then try to remove it with the wisdom which the Lord bestows upon you; and the first thing you know, your gloom is gone, you feel light, the Spirit of the Lord is upon you, and everything seems illuminated.”¹⁰

In today’s world of pop psychology, junk TV, and feel-good self-help manuals, this advice may seem counterintuitive. We are sometimes told that the answer to our ills is to look inward, to indulge ourselves, to spend first and pay later, and to satisfy our own desires even at the expense of those around us. While there are times when it is prudent to look first to our own needs, in the long run it doesn’t lead to lasting happiness.

An Instrument in the Hands of the Lord

I believe that the women of the Church, regardless of age or family status, understand and apply best the words of James Barrie, the author of Peter Pan: “Those who bring sunshine to the lives of others cannot keep it from themselves.”¹¹ Often I have witnessed quiet acts of kindness and compassion by noble women who extended themselves in unselfish charity. My heart swells when I hear stories of the sisters of the Church and how they rush to the aid of those in need.

There are those in the Church—both men and women—who wonder how they can contribute to the kingdom. Sometimes women who are single, divorced, or widowed wonder if there is a place for them. Every sister in the Church is of critical importance—not only to our Heavenly Father but also to the building of the kingdom of God as well. There is a great work to do.

One year ago in this meeting, President Monson taught that “you are . . . surrounded by opportunities for service. . . . Often small acts of service are all that is required to lift and bless another.”¹² Look around you. There at sacrament meeting is a young mother with several children—offer to sit with her and help. There in your neighborhood is a young man who seems discouraged—tell him you enjoy being in his presence, that you feel his goodness. True words of encouragement require only a loving and caring heart but may have an eternal impact on the life of those around you.

You wonderful sisters render compassionate service to others for reasons that supersede desires for personal benefits. In this you emulate the Savior, who, though a king, did not seek position, nor was He concerned about whether others noticed Him. He did not bother to compete with others. His thoughts were always tuned to help others. He taught, healed, conversed, and listened to others. He knew that greatness had little to do with outward signs of prosperity or position. He taught and lived by this doctrine: “He that is greatest among you shall be your servant.”¹³

In the end, the number of prayers we say may contribute to our happiness, but the number of prayers we answer may be of even greater importance. Let us open our eyes and see the heavy hearts, notice the loneliness and despair; let us feel the silent prayers of others around us, and let us be an instrument in the hands of the Lord to answer those prayers.

Conclusion

My dear sisters, I have a simple faith. I believe that as you are faithful and diligent in keeping the commandments of God, as you draw closer to Him in faith, hope, and charity, things will work together for your good.¹⁴ I believe that as you immerse yourselves in the work of our Father—as you create beauty and as you are compassionate to others—God will encircle you in the arms of His love.¹⁵ Discouragement, inadequacy, and weariness will give way to a life of meaning, grace, and fulfillment.

As spirit daughters of our Heavenly Father, happiness is your heritage.

You are choice daughters of our Heavenly Father, and through the things you create and by your compassionate service, you are a great power for good. You will make the world a better place. Lift up your chin; walk tall. God loves you. We love and admire you.

Of this I testify, and leave you my blessing as an Apostle of the Lord, in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

2009-09-01T09:59:00.000-07:00

I was thinking since it is the first day of the month, and the closing of a chapter in our life (The Sugarhouse Days) it would be appropriate to start a new project that I have been meaning to take up at some point, Project 365.

What project 365 is: Basically you take a picture from every day for a year and turn it into an album. I thought it would be fun to try and blog about the day too and when it is all done a year from now have it printed into a nice book to look at years from now.

I took my first step yesterday without even knowing it by charging my camera batteries. Now for the fun.

Life has changed

2009-09-01T07:39:00.000-07:00

Since the last time I really posted there have been many developments with our family!

First, our second baby boy was born on July 30th. He was born at 5:57 am, weighed 6 lbs 2 oz, and was 20.5 inches long! We named him Jackson Edward. He was a few weeks early, but perfectly healthy and absolutely adorable! I would add a picture, but apparently I cannot access the right drive on this computer! He is an amazing little guy who loves to be cuddled and loved. Ryan loves him so much, he gives him kisses and helps find things I need for him.

Next, Anthony has decided to go into the Photography business full time! He started an LLC yesterday, has a tentative studio, and is really excited to get started. This means we all have a lot of work ahead of us! I'm currently working on some business materials for him, but haven't quite got what I want yet...

Dominic and I have moved in with his parents for a bit. Not sure how long we will be here. It's going okay but I sure miss my home. Our apartment was the first place that I've really felt was our home and I am sad to leave it behind. Today we will do the final packing and say goodbye for good. :(

Both Dominic and I are thinking about going back to school. He has decided to go into Mechanical Engineering, and I am thinking of a degree in Graphic Design. There are a lot of details to work out to make it all happen, but hopefully it will all work out.

Ryan is talking up a storm now! He has learned so many new words. My favorites are "Bubble", "thank-you", and the way he says "Jack".

Anyway, there is a quick update!

Lots to think about...

2009-08-31T22:05:00.000-07:00

Smells

2009-06-08T09:25:00.000-07:00

Today I feel like my life is totally out of my control.

I try to take control as best I can, but just when I think I have a handle on life something gets thrown into the mix that I don't quite expect and...

Well, things just fall apart.

Blame it on pregnancy hormones or something...

So, I caught some little bug this weekend. Under normal conditions this would be no big deal, but with the HG any dip in my immune system causes me to be ill again. I am so tired of vomiting! If I ever puke again in my entire life it would be too soon! The littlest smell will set me off and make me wish I had a little bubble to live in where no outside smell could bother me.

Baby Stuffs

2009-06-01T12:18:00.000-07:00

I decided today to go through what baby stuff we have and make a list of things we are lacking in. I think this will help me as I put together our Amazon registry and when we go out to the outlet malls on Thursday.
I've decided to break it into two catagories, stuff we need before the little hatchling comes, and stuff that can wait until he's a bit older.

Need Soon:
Breast Pump
Baby Care Set
Car Seat Sun Shade
Newborn diapers
Cloth Diapers
Diaper Bag
Gel Breast Soothers

Not sure where to Put it:
Double stroller- We need it, but I can probably pack the little one in a carrier for a while and use the single. Definately need this before winter sets in though!

Can Wait, But Need:
Diaper Pail
Stroller Weather Cover
Snow Suit
Crib Set

I Love Being a Mother

2009-05-15T09:23:00.000-07:00

Sure, being a mother has it's ups and downs... Like being kept up all night by a sick baby, or spending as many hours as you were in labor trying to scrub paint out of your rental apartments floor... but it sure is great! I love my little boy so much! I love his sweet little snuggles, and his happy feet dances, and the cute way he's been saying hi and bye lately.
I had a great mother's day. Got lots of stuff for my scrapbooking, plus a pair of earrings that match my wedding ring, and Ryan got me a big bouquet of flowers and helped his dad make breakfast for me.

My poor kid has some kind of bug. He hasn't been running a fever, so I'm thinking it's just allergies. If it doesn't clear up soon I think we will take him to the doctor just to be safe. My brother was recently diagnosed with swine flu, so I can't be too careful with my little guy!

Speaking of the little guy... I think he just went into the bathroom to play with the toilet! Better go stop him!

Poor Little Elephant

2009-05-04T09:52:00.000-07:00

Ryan has had one little elephant stuffed animal that he has loved more than all the rest. His name is squeego, and he is Ryan's best buddy. There was a time when he could not sleep without his little elephant snuggled with him.
I've gone to great lengths to make sure he doesn't lose him. He has only been allowed to take Squeego to grandparents houses, and never out for walks.
Well Saturday morning I made a mistake and packed him for our trip to Manti. He was so happy to play with him! He was handing him to everyone outside the temple! It was adorable!
Unfortunately Squeego did not make it home.
I cried myself to sleep last night because I was so sad. I feel so stupid for packing him. I never do that! I am SO sad!
Holly

How could it be any better than this?

2009-04-27T12:24:00.000-07:00

So, being pregnant has it's ups and downs... one of the downs is random crying over sappy things.
I was listening to Pandora Radio and a Lifehouse song came on called "Everything". I was holding Ryan in my arms while he slept and was just listening to the song and I started crying. The lyrics just made me think of how much I love my sweet little family.

Find Me Here
Speak To Me
I want to feel you
I need to hear you
You are the light
That's leading me
To the place
where I find peace, again.

You are the strength, that keeps me walking.
You are the hope, that keeps me trusting.
You are the light, to my soul.
You are my purpose, you're everything.

And how can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

You calm the storms, and you give me rest.
You hold me in your hands, you won't let me fall.
You still my heart, and you take my breath away.
Would you take me in? Take me deeper now?

And How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?
And how can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

Cause you're all I want, you're all I need
You're everything, everything
You're all I want, you're all I need
You're everything, everything.
You're all I want, you're all I need.
You're everything, everything
You're all I want, you're all I need.
You're everything, everything.

And how can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?
And how can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better, any better than this.

And How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you?
Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

Would you tell me how could it be any better than this?

Anyway. Just sitting here crying and being sappy while my little boy snuggles up in my arms and sleeps.

Childless Moments and Bling!

2009-04-23T09:27:00.000-07:00

Dom's parents have been taking Ryan overnight every other week for a while now, and boy is it great! We both get so much done when the kid is away for a few hours!
Dominic and I went out to dinner last night at one of my favorite places, P.F. Changs. It was so delicious! We ordered the usuals (Veggie Lettuce wraps and Mapo Tofu) and switched it up a bit by ordering a side for the first time, Asparagus, mmmmm... It was absolutely incredible as usual. We sat on a patio table and enjoyed our meal. We decided to order dessert and asked the waitress to bring out the tray for us to see. There was a bit of a mishap, and one of the (fake) desserts went flying and smaked me right in the chest! The manager came running to make sure the dessert was okay (it costs $65 for the little fake dessert!) and we recognized him from the last time we were there. We mentioned to our server how nice he had been and she went and told him so he came out and chatted with us for a bit. He was very nice and comped about a third of our meal! He also said anytime we came to ask for him and he'd make sure we were taken care of! How cool is that?! Needless to say we will be back many times!

This morning I have been working on a mini album thing I bought at Scrapbook USA last month. It is turning out so beautifully! It has a bunch of little rhinestones throughout, and glitter, and rub-ons! I love it! As soon as I finish I am going to scan it and put it up. SO CUTE!

I think I will make this my every other thursday ritual, working on something creative. It makes me happy, and I don't have Ryan so I don'y have to worry about him getting into my stuff!

Killed with Kisses

2009-04-22T07:32:00.000-07:00

Yesterday Ryan was being such a cute little guy! He was giving me kisses ALL day. I would be sitting and he come jump all over me scrambling to get to my face, and then he would kiss me and say "Thank You" as he ran away. It was cute, but it sure did hurt to get trampled by the little guy so many times.
I went over to the in-laws last night to work on some images for a client. I have a little bit more to do, but overall it was productive. It would have been more so if photoshop had not been removed from the computer at some point between Thanksgiving and now! Ryan had a blast though, he was doing "exercises" with his grandparents, which involved him spinning in circles and clapping his hands while giggling. It was pretty cute.

Today he has started off in a grumpy mood. I sure love him, but somedays I wish he would just tell me what it is he wants! At least tonight he is going over to the in-laws for a sleepover, so I will get a bit of time off to get some stuff done.

Stuff

2009-04-20T08:25:00.000-07:00

This week I am suppossed to be focusing on the bedroom. We're suppossed to make it into a "Vacation Retreat", getting all the clutter out and making it a relaxing room. They say that the bedroom should be the cleanest room in your house... well mine is probably the messiest room in the house right now!

Dominic got the kitchen clean! Yeah! I have a clean kitchen for the first time since December!

In other news I'm sick. I've been running a fever, have a sore throat, wicked headache, plus the nausea... I am feeling pretty miserable. Oh, I'm sunburned too. Lots of fun.

As far as workin on the bedroom today... does sleeping in my bed count?

Vegetarian Freezer Meals

2009-04-17T09:40:00.000-07:00

One of the things Fly Lady advocates is freezer meals, where you cook a bunch of meals in one day and freeze them. This is quite popular, if you've ever heard of My Girlfriend's kitchen you know what I mean! I love the idea, but find myself at a standstill for one reason: a cookbook for my needs is not available! Being vegetarian makes my cookbook selection very limited, compared to the wide array of cookbooks available for omnivores, and there just is not a cookbook for vegetarian freezer meals! How incredibly sad!
This got me thinking... I am a fairly good cook, why don't I write a cookbook? If I am looking for it there has to be someone else out there who wants it too. After a google search I found a couple of websites that offer a small section of veggie freezer meals, but nothing worth writing home about.
So maybe I'll write a cookbook...
Or maybe not...
Whatever...
Holly

Stupid Procrastination

2009-04-13T08:52:00.000-07:00

So I pretty much did nothing productive this weekend. I watched a bunch of television with my hubby, played a few games, and went to the park. So now I feel guilty that I didn't get anything done.
Ryan is being a pest this morning. He is alternating between being a cute snuggle bug and screaming his full head off anytime I LEAVE THE ROOM! Darn child. How can I get anything done if you are acting like this!
Holly

Friday Fun!

2009-04-10T08:37:00.000-07:00

Ry and I are going to go to the pool today with Bryanna! Yeah! I am so excited! I have been wanting to go swimming for a while, but lacked the motivation to get my butt over there with Ryan.
The plan is for around 2:30 ish, so I have a few hours to get some stuff done around the house. Probably just going to continue to do laundry today and give myself a little bit of a break.
Maybe I will take off a little early and head over to old navy. I want to get an easter onsie for Ryan to dye eggs in tonight at my parents. We had him wear a white one last year and I saved it. It's so cute! He was dumping the dye, so he had a HUGE pink blob on the bottom. It is seriously cute! I think it is something I want to keep doing as an easter tradition.
We are going over to my parents tonight for dinner and egg dying. They are picking Ry and I up from the pool this afternoon and then going to get Dominic from work.
Anyway. I'm going to go get ready for the day!
Holly

Just A Little Motivation

2009-04-09T09:07:00.000-07:00

"The foundation for what we do is loving ourselves. This makes everything work. You are not loving yourself when you are running around in a frenzy! Slow and steady is what gets our home and our lives in order. One babystep at a time. You can do this"

Yesterday...

2009-04-09T08:15:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I got a late start. I slept later than normal, because I was waiting for my "alarm clock" to go off. He happened to be at the In-laws, so I was thrown off. Oh well.
I was still feeling icky from my double missed doses of medicine the day before, so I ate some breakfast and took a shower instead of getting right to work. I ended up wasting most of the morning, and a good part of the afternoon just taking care of my body. I shaved! (Who knows how long that's been...) and I soaked my feet and gave myself a foot massage, etc. I also got the floors and walls cleaned in the bathroom and a start on the shower, Dom finished it when he got home.
My bathroom is clean! I sprayed some aromatheraphy stuff in the air and it smells heavenly. I think I will just go live in the bathroom for the next four months. If only my whole house were that clean! Maybe someday...

Dom came home talking about some computer program he wants called "Campaign Cartographer". I agreed to let him get the basic version if I could get my Mary Kay face wash, facial lotion, and foundation. So looks like I need to be calling my Mary Kay Lady! My skin has seriously benefitted from the timewise skin care system! I love it! I just wish I had the money for the Ultimate miracle set! My skin would be in freaking heaven! I can tell such a difference in the days I use my Mary Kay products and they days I don't. It feels so much more smooth and hydrated. I wish I had been using it sooner!
Anyway, enough about Mary Kay.

With the bathroom clean I now feel obligated to move onto another room. I haven't decided where to go yet, but I am thinking Ryan's room. His closet is really a mess, and I need to figure out how I am going to fit the Hatchling's stuff in there too! A little bot of cleaning should help me wrap my head around how to move things around to make room for the little one this August! In the long run we are going to switch rooms and have the boys in our room instead. But while the hatchling is still sleeping in our room we really need the space!
Holly

Fly Lady

2009-04-08T09:02:00.000-07:00

So, I'm trying to implement the Fly Lady system into my home. I've looked at it before, and started doing in back in June, but kind of got side-tracked with life and let it fall by the wayside. I think it is a great system, and if I can actually get it into my life I think it will work fabulously for me.
Things I like about it:

The positive messages that are all thorough out the system. Things like "FLY" which means Finally Loving Yourself. Or the emphasis that you are never behind, just pick up where you are.
Focusing on taking care of yourself. They encourage you to take breaks to drink some water, exercise, etc. They also encourage you to schedule a "weekly pamper" and do something just for you!
The great chunks! One of the things they say often is "You can do anything in 15 minutes" and the encorage you to have a timer set for 15 minutes and work in that little chunk of time! As a SAHM this helps a lot! Ryan can entertain himself for 15 minutes while I check off one of my little tasks!

Things I don't like:

The "Dressed to Shoes" part. I absolutely hate wearing shoes! And they want you to put them on first thing in the morning, AND they want them to be lace-ups. I'm currently trying to make a compromise and find a pair of comfy slip-on shoes I won't mind wearing for the day. Seriously, it's already getting hard to tie my shoes, and I'm only 5 months along!
The shiny sink. I can't go in my kitchen right now. I'm delegating that to Dom, little bits at a time, but the fact that this is one of thier biggest emphasis makes me feel a little shabby since mine is not perfectly clean and I can hardly do anything about it.

Darn Child!

2009-04-08T07:59:00.000-07:00

Ryan figured out two things yesterday... zippers and door knobs. This caused my medicine to be lost and me have to call in to get it refilled and miss two doses. Which made me sick. Grrrr...

I got much done yesterday, despite the afternoon being difficult. I decluttered and cleaned the bathroom! I set up a changing station in the bathroom, as we are trying to only change Ryan's diaper in the bathroom to help him associate the bathroom with those bodily functions. I had to clear off our dryer to make room for it, but in the process I got a bunch of stuff for DI together! My bathroom is now much more organized, and I have one little slice of my home that I feel proud of. I still need to mop the floor (as my NVP kicked in near the end of my sweeping), and clean the shower a bit, but it looks fabulous! Go me!

I also boxed up almost all my non-maternity clothes. I've been trying to convince myself I still fit in them, but this is a delusion... I'm pregnant. The closet was getting cramped with the addition of my maternity clothes, so out went the non-maternity- save a few pants, a skirt, and some sweaters- and now my closet has 1/4 of what it did. Hopefully it will help me determine what I still need to make my maternity wardrobe liveable. So far I think I need a pair of black pants (mine from last pregnancy dissappeared, too bad, they were the best!), black, white, and tan maternity tanks or camisoles (as maternity clothes tend to be low cut...), and a tan or brown skirt. Other stuff wouldn't hurt, but I think those are things I REALLY need. I'm tired of my non-maternity camisoles riding up.
It helps that I got a big box of stuff from a lady in my ward recently, that I stole a few pairs of maternity pants and a shirt from my sister-in-law, and that I have bought cheap stuff between pregnancies as I found them. Without that I would have ONE pair of pants (icky brown stretchy ones, mostly good for lounging), seven shirts, one skirt, and two dresses.
As it is I have four pairs of pants, two pairs of capris, a pair of shortalls, a pair of shorts, one skirt, 17 shirts, and 5 dresses. Plus my wonderful belly bands! I'm still squeezing some use out of a couple pairs of pants and a skirt thanks to them!

I am growing faster this time for sure! I'm showing enough that strangers comment. That didn't happen until I was 7 months pregnant with Ryan! I'm about five months right now, so that's a huge difference!
Holly

Getting Closer

2009-04-07T07:37:00.001-07:00

Yesterday I did a marathon of laundry, which puts me very nearly caught up with ALL the laundry. I was even good and sorted out all the things that don't fit Ryan and I! One more day of obsessive laundry doing and I should be done with everything! Woo hoo! Small glimmer of progress!
I assigned Dominic the Fly Lady Task of scrubbing the counters, as the kitchen is still in a state that makes it impossible for me to be in there. He scrubbed the counters and got two loads of dishes done. It still is not up to par, but it's going to get there.
The kitchen is where the main focus is going to be until it is clean, and then it will just be daily maintainance. I never want to see my kitchen that bad again!

I started an account at rememberthemilk.com and have scheduled tasks for this whole week, breaking things into smaller chunks. Hopefully this will help us.

Tomorrow my in-laws are taking Ryan for the day. I think I may try and recruit a friend to come over and be my partner in crime as I clean. It is always easier when you have good company!
Holly

Only the Home can Compare with the Temple in Sacredness

2009-04-06T08:06:00.000-07:00

Conference this weekend was wonderful. We didn't have a chance to watch the saturday sessions, but we did get to watch the Sunday sessions! I was so happy we did!
One talk in particular really made an impression on me. Not sure who it was but he talked about temples, and our homes. He had us take a "virtual reality tour" of our homes... wow. Talk about a kick in the butt from the Lord! I think it is the kick I needed to get myself in gear and get my house in order again.

Shall we all take it? Imagine that you are opening your front door and walking inside your home:

What do you see, and how do you feel? (a mess, stressed, helpless)

Is it a place of love, peace, and refuge from the world as is the temple? (It is a place of love, but there is not really much peace or refuge for me, it is constantly making me feel inferior and unworthy of my calling as a mother and wife)

Is it clean and orderly? (nope, it is chaos in raw form, it smells, there are flies, nothing is clean, nowhere is orderly)

As you walk through the rooms of your home do you see uplifting images, including appropriate images of the Temple and the Savior? ( There is a statue of the temple in the living room, as well as a tile picture of the Savior, but nothing in other rooms. I don't think any of the images we have are not uplifting though)

Is your bedroom or sleeping area a place for personal prayer? (t is a place of chaos, and preayers aren't said nearly as often as they should be)

Is your gathering area or kitchen a place where food is prepared or enjoyed together, allowing uplifting conversation and family time? (Nope, I haven't cooked in it since December, and it hasn't been fully cleaned since then. I cannot go in without vomiting, so there is little room for conversation, uplifting or not.)

Are the scriptures found in a room where the family can study, pray, and learn together? (I can never find my scriptures, and I don't think I have ever read a scripture outside of church to my little Ryan)

Can you find a personal gospel study space? (Nope, if you can't find your scriptures it is hard to have a study space.)

Does the music you hear, or the entertainment you seek offend the spirit? (I try not to listen/watch anything that would be offensive to the spirit, but I am sure there are things in my home that would)

Is the conversation uplifting, without contention? (Most of the time, though the cleanliness of the house puts me in a sour mood, and when Dom promises to clean and doesn't it causes contention)

Honestly, my home is not much of any of these at the moment... it could use some great improvement...

I have decided to start with the physical aspects of the virtual tour. If my house is more orderly and clean it will greatly improve how I feel about myself and my family, which will make it easier for me to focus on the spirit in our home and making our home a place of refuge and contentment. This is a gigantic task, and it looms before me like a mountain of hardship... but I need to do it. If you want something done right you got to do it yourself, right?
I'm going to start by trying to do the flylady system again. I tried it last summer for a while and it seemed to work well for a while, I just need to have the gumption to stick with it and make my home a more inviting place.
Wish me luck!
Holly

Inadequacy

2009-03-31T14:48:00.000-07:00

My mother took Ryan last night and all of today so I could have a bit of a break, and I got nothing done.
My house is a complete mess, though my hubby has been trying to clean it he never really gets there. Even on the Zofran for my nausea and vomiting i have a lack of energy, and an inability to get things done. I'm afraid to do anything that might set off the awful cycle of vomiting that plagued me for so many weeks. So instead of attempting to clean my house I have sat in my room... only emerging to pop something in the oven to eat... which caused a bought of retching.
I know that physically my body needs rest after so much strain, but mentally I feel incredibly lazy and inept. My house is a pig-sty to the point that I am embarrassed to have people over, my laundry is piling up, my kitchen can't really be cooked in... and I can't get myself to do a darn thing about it. It makes me feel broken, useless, etc. I feel like this pregnancy has taken a lot more out of me than anything else I have ever experienced. I feel like there is a scar from the constant vomiting that has pushed me into placid inaction, and I don't know how to jump that hurtle.
I wish I had the energy, initiative, and stomach to do a total overhaul of our apartment and clean it from top to bottom! It is driving me nuts, but I feel like it is not something I can take on and win.
I'm about the most useless housewife there ever was at the moment...

Bamboo Craft

2009-03-01T12:49:00.000-08:00

I have been seriously debating buying a tablet of some type for a while now. I help my father-in-law with his photography business, mostly end product tweaking, and thought that a tablet would enhance my ability to work in photoshop.
Well, this bamboo craft seems awesome! Not only could I use it for my work (bonus points!), it would be perfect for my personal scrapbooking and other crafts! I would so love to have one... and just might convince my husband or father-in-law to pony up the money for one as a gift.
With a new baby on the way I am going to have plenty on my hands, and the retreat into photoshop with a fun new toy would be awesome! And with all it's extra's there will be plenty to do when I can't sleep after a late night feeding!
Holly

P.s. They are giving away a free Bamboo Craft on Digiscrap101.com! So get over there, register, and enter for your chance to win a free one!

2008-12-11T06:40:00.000-08:00

So, since my last post much has been going on! I finished a couple more layouts (which I will post in a few minutes). Ryan learned how to play peek-a-boo by himself. He also learned a handful of new words including "anta" which I am inclined to think means "santa". And I found out that baby #2 is on it's way!
I need to schedule an OB appointment, so I need to find an OB. Definately not going back to Dr. Susanka. He made me so angry! Just not caring enough for my tastes. When I ended up in the hospital for smoke inhalation due to a fire at our house he had one question "Is your house okay?"... yeah. And so is my baby thank you very much.
Ryan is growing so fast! He is such a quick learner! He picks up a new word every day, I swear!
Anyway... on to the layouts!

These were all made for the CT challange I was telling you about over at Brownie Scraps. you can find my gallery here for more specific information about the layouts, because I am feeling lazy today and don't feel like linking to the products again...
Hope you all are having a wonderful Holiday season so far!

I'm Excited

2008-12-05T13:49:00.000-08:00

I am so excited for everything this month! There is just so much to look forward to! I keep telling myself to calm down, but I can't! I'm just super, super excited for Christmas this year!

On a whim yesterday I decided to try out for a Creative team for scrapbooking. It sounded like it might be a fun thing, and I've never tried before, so I jumped in feet first! I have my first layout for the first challange posted. I love how it turned out. I just wish I had my real computer so I could use my wonderful atomic cupcake actions, and all my beautiful brushes to add just that little extra to things. I'm down to the bare bones trial version on Joseph's laptop until we get our laptop fan replaced.
Anyway... for your viewing pleasure here is what I created.

I used the "Perfect Dreams" kit from Brownie Scraps.
I think it turned out quite lovely. I can't wait to get going on my next page. I wish I had all my pictures on this laptop, because I have the perfect pictures for the other kit in the challange! Oh well, maybe we can get it up long enough to transfer them to the external hard drive!
Anyway, that's all!
Holly

Christmas Songs

2008-10-27T14:06:00.000-07:00

I'm tying to get in the mood for christmas, and stumbled upon a blog... here are my answers to the christmas song challange they gave. I got all of them but one!

1. God Rest ye Merry Gentlemen
2. We three Kings
3. The First Noel
4. The Little Drummer Boy
5. Silent Night
6. Do You Hear What I hear
7. Joy to the world
8. What Child is this
9. Oh Little Town of Bethlahem
10. Oh Holy Night
11. Angels We Have Heard on High
12. Away In a Manger
13. It came upon a midnight clear
14. Deck the Halls
15. Wee Wish You a Merry Christmas
16. Oh Come all ye Faithful
17. Silver Bells
18. Jingle Bells
19. Hark the Herald Angels Sing
20. Adeste Fidelis
21. Grandma Got Ran Over By A Reindeer
22. The Twelve Days Of Christmas
23. I'm dreaming of a white Christmas
24. The Christmas Song
25. Oh tannembaum
26. Have yourself a merry little christmas
27. Let It Snow, Let it Snow, Let it Snow
28. I'll be home for christmas
29. White Christmas
30. Santa Claus is coming to town
31. Winter Wonderland
32. I saw mommy kissing santa claus
33. Roudolf the Red Nosed Reindeer
34. All I want for christmas is my two front teeth
35. Here Comes Santa Clause
36. Jingle Bell Rock
37. Rockin around the Christmas Tree
38. Carol Of The Bells
39. Here We Come a Caroling
40. Good King Wenceslas
41. Oh Come, Oh Come Emanuel
42. Go Tell It on The mountain
43. Have a Holy Jolly Christmas
44. Frosty the Snowman
45. Feliz Navidad
46. I'm Getting Nothing For Christmas
47. I want a hippopotumus for Christmas
48. Where are you christmas
49.
50. White Christmas

Head on over to the site and try it yourself!
http://365-days-of-christmas.blogspot.com/

A couple Layouts

2008-10-24T12:44:00.001-07:00

I'm trying to scrap a layout a day, to help me get into the habit of recording stuff. Here are the two I have done so far. I love them!

everydaylife
Originally uploaded by holly_beth_slc

fatherlove
Originally uploaded by holly_beth_slc

Thinking Ahead

2008-10-20T12:25:00.000-07:00

I was reading a blog today that did a "week in the life of" scrapbook challange and it got me to thinking about my life and how I want to document it. I was participating in a challange on Digiscrap101 where we did a page every day, but I dropped out for personal reasons. I loved the idea of capturing everyday life though. I know we all think of our lives as mundane for the most part, but what precious things are we forgetting because we don't document every little thing?
Anyway, for myself, documenting everyday is much too stressful and time consuming, but I really want to document my family's story as we grow and learn. I've decided that I am going to try and document at least a whole year (from this date) with a page a week scrapbook. I dug out a photo album that was a wedding gift and a small journal that I've hardly used and I am going to try to write about the things that matter to my family NOW, not just the events and special occasions. Scrapbooking is suppossed to document life, right? I might use prompts for some weeks if I am not sure what to document, but I am going to try hard to make this a special glimpse into my family and our life for generations to come.
Wish me luck!

All Scrapped Out

2008-10-16T18:30:00.000-07:00

I am one layout away from finishing the wedding photobook I am working on and I am absolutely stuck.Do you ever get in a rut? I've been working on this for three weeks on and off and I have just exhausted my creativity! I hate that I am so close and have no idea what to do! I can't get myself to just walk away though, because my photobook coupon expires soon and I never pay full price for anything I don't have to!I love the way it is turning out though! I think Liz will be ecstatic when she sees it. Her beauty, my Father-in-law's photography skills, and my little bit of creativity have turned it into something I'm sure she will love, if only I ever finish it!My husband took Ryan out for a while so I could work in peace, but my head is just spinning with all the other things I need to do. There's dinner to be made, floors to vaccum, scrapbook supplies to be put away (they've been out since mid-september, so they are WAY over due for reshelving!), and I would sure like to take a nap!Anyway, I thought I would share a glimpse into what I have been working on:

That's the bride (of course!) and one of our good friends. If I had time I would upload more, but I have to get dinner in the oven and try to finish this stinkin' photobook!
All the papers and elements are from a work in progress
Word Art is from Elegant word art by Bethany