I Needed that

This weekend Dom took the boys camping with my dad and the scouts. This left me at home all weekend alone. Unable to find friends to hang out with I decided I would go out and do something for myself. I got my hair dyed and cut, and my eye brows waxed. It made me feel so much better about myself to do something for me! Right now life is crazy and I am always doing homework or cleaning, or something. This was the first time I got to go out by myself and do something that didn't benefit anyone but me. I feel fabulous and renewed!

The Vegetarian Mom *updated*

This semester I am taking a website design class. As part of the class we are developing a website of our choosing, buying a domain name, and publishing our site on the web. I had been thinking about what I would do for this when it suddenly came to me: Vegetarian meals.
In a post some time ago I lamented the fact that there is not a great resource for the busy vegetarian who would like to do once a month cooking (freezer meals) and mused about writing a cookbook on just that topic. I got quite a few responses to it from strangers around the web looking for the same things. I put it off in my mind as a "maybe later".
Well "maybe later" is here, but in a slightly different medium! I have decided to develop a website on this! I am going to be testing vegetarian variants of freezer meals I can find, as well as crockpot meals, and quick meals, and compiling them into a website that is just what I have been looking for this whole time!
If you have come upon this post looking for just these things be looking for posts on my progress on this website! And please post your encouragement and suggestions for me so I can make this a website that will work for others like me!

You can now find my blog for this at www.thevegetarianmom.blogspot.com
If you like what you see go over to facebook and "like" the vegetarian mom here.

Maybe I should..

On monday I was stumbling (try stumble upon! It's amazing) and founda tutorial on how to make a fabric flower. It looked easy enough, and I had all the materials at hand, so I made one. It turned out great! I got lots of compliments on it, and after they found out I made it myself, several people encouraged me to start an etsy shop and start selling them.
Considering how fast, easy, and inexpensive it was to make I am seriously considering it.
The biggest thing in my way is confidence. I don't fell like I can do it. I feel like I will fail. I am afraid to try. I have a bunch of ideas and inspiration, and I think it would be really fun, but I am not sure I could actually sell them. Where do I start? How much inventory do I need? What can I do to set my product apart from all the others? What would my line be called? Should I market to little babies, women, teens, a little of all of them?
I don't know, all of it just overwhelms me!
I think today I am going to go out and buy myself some fabric to make a dress, so while I'm out I am going to price out lining fabric and see what sorts of stuff I can find on the clearance rack and start making a few more... We'll see where it goes.

Sometimes I hate people...

I have been seriously struggling lately with feelings of deprivation and putting my wants and needs last. With money tight the last month or so I have put off pretty much everything that I wanted, and even most things that I needed in order to get by and take care of my family. I didn't eat practically all of finals week because I knew the money needed to be spent elsewhere. I have gone without for my family, and now that there is some money that I can actually do something with I am being chastised for wanting to spend some money on myself.
Is life really worth it if you have to deprive yourself of everything? Am I really selfish for wanting to go out and get a haircut? Or maybe some pants since I'm about to wear a whole in the bottom of the only pair of jeans that fit? Is it wrong of me to want to buy some thread so that I can alter a dress I bought forever ago into a modest shirt? Is it really wrong of me to want to do something for myself instead of doing everything for everyone else?
I spent all summer going to school so that my family will be better off some day. I hated it, I struggled. I did it for them, not for me. I sacrificed going to girl's nights with my friends so my family could eat longer. I sacrificed doing my hobbies so Dom could have time to do his.
Everyone one keeps telling me that motherhood is about sacrifice, but at what point do you put your foot down and say, "What about me?". Am I really going to be a better mother if I deprive myself of everything?
I guess I am just a selfish horrible person. Thanks people for making me feel guilty for wanting to take care of myself. You suck.

Starting School

Next week marks the begining of a new adventure for Ryan and I: School.
Ryan has gotten to be quite the handful of energy, and in an attempt to harness that energy we are going to start having some more formal education. This week I put up a little area for what we are going to learn, designed some flash cards, got some art supplies, and went to the library for some books. Monday we start learning! What are we learning about? Cows. That's right, Cows.